White Man Shoots Black Woman In The Back Of The Head Because She Asked For Help

I generally try to keep the titles of my posts short and sweet and to the point. Today the point is not short nor is it sweet, and you reading this will have to deal with it or take a fucking hike because right now I am THIS close to doing something I’m going to regret.

But INSTEAD, I’m writing this post because for the last 24 hours or so since I heard about what how Renisha McBride was shot and killed – MURDERED – in cold blood for no other reason than the color of her skin, I have been at the boiling point.

And people ask me why I’m leaving this country.

The racism here is so personal, the hate is so intensely deep and personal. The bigotry is bone deep and so inherently personal. You can cut it with a knife this particular American brand of White Supremacy, this racism this that makes white people comfortable enough to shoot me down like a dog.

Oh and the killing of Jonathan Ferrell is why you are thinking this current incident sounds so familiar. Another Black person shot and killed because they were asking for help after an auto accident. Welcome to America.


When I first read THIS ARTICLE about what happened, I thought it could get no worse. There were scant details, as it was breaking news. A woman hurt in a car accident goes to a house to ask for help, she gets shot in the head and killed. Initially her death gets reported as a body dump – attempt at covering up, by the killer or police or both it wasn’t clear – and we read that the name of the murdering son of a bitch is not released.

RENISHA MCBRIDE WAS 19 YEARS OLD. In case you were wondering.

I thought this story could not get any worse. Log into my Twitter feed this morning and come to find out the head shot was from BEHIND. Renisha was turning away from the door – because her pleas for help had obviously been ignored and that’s when the cowardly killing murderer decided it was fine and dandy to take his shot and put a bullet in Renisha’s brain as she was TURNED AWAY FROM HIM AND LEAVING.

Despite the headline of this article: SELF DEFENSE IS NOT SHOOTING SOMEONE WHEN THEY ARE WALKING AWAY FROM YOU. When you are defending yourself from something, that something is usually coming at you, attacking you, prompting you to find and use a defense against them.

You know, like in SPORTS – football and soccer for example. When the opposing team is comin at ya, you use defense to guard your goal. You are on the offense when you take the ball into their territory and challenge their goal.

Hell, even I know these basic “man rules”: Never shoot someone in the back, and never kick a person when they are down. But see Black people aren’t human beings. We aren’t people. Those rules don’t apply to us. We are beasts to be exterminated whenever you get a chance.

There are laws already been in place for CENTURIES that will protect you and certainly aren’t written for that animal you just killed, so go ahead and pull that trigger.

American Racism History Moment: Those Voor Trekkers in South Africa thought our system of Jim Crow was so amazing and excellent that they copied it and used it as a base for their system of racial separation, hatred and oppression (white supremacy). they called theirs APARTHEID. Did you know that????


But Woo! Threat! I was afeared for my life! I stood my ground! It was late at night and Black people – especially 19 year old hurt Black women pleading for help – are SO SCARY AND DANGEROUS! Of course I gunned it down, that horrible, life-threatening… Black… THING!

You have to understand that ignoring your front door being knocked on, or a 2am doorbell ring is one thing. And getting your shotgun, waiting until that person is turned away and leaving, then opening your door and shooting them in the head is quite another.

Steps were taken. Choices were made. He chose to end that young woman’s life. Just like that nice white woman chose to call the police on Jonathan Ferrell instead of calling the paramedics.

Remember when I said “comfortable shooting Black people down like dogs”? See this is the part of RACISM that so many white people just don’t get. They whine about not having a white TV channel, or white history month, or a white student union, and consistently equate the NAACP with the Ku Klux Klan.


This person felt comfortable shooting this Black person down like a dog – murdering her, killing her – because there is a SYSTEM that is endemic to this country that will protect him from harm.

Look at it at work already. He has yet to be charged with anything. Not even – what’s that term for “accidentally” killing someone – manslaughter? His name is not released. He remains comfortably anonymous, and is chilling at home with his family.

While the McBride family mourns.

I really wish I could say that if I did the exact same thing, I’d get the same treatment. And before you speak remember Marissa Alexander who fired a gun INTO THE AIR to scare off her attacker and was slapped into jail with a 20 year sentence.

When yet another murderer of a promising young Black person walks around free, uncharged. Sound familiar?

SO SHUT THE FUCK UP because while you embarrass yourself with the counter-hashtag #WhiteGirlsRock because a two hour annual program celebrating #BlackGirlsRock is so offensive to you and seems so UNFAIR



I made this appeal on twitter yesterday, and I’m making it here now. I’m hiring a hacker. Or I hope they would, like Anonymous donate their skills and their time to the cause.

I want Renisha McBride’s muderer’s name to be released, leaked, doxxed – whatever you call it nowadays.

Posted on websites, tumblrs, FB, tweeted all around the world, painted on subway walls, posted up on a billboard. Along with their address the scene of the CRIME. So we can all get a good look.

So local people can drop by and visit and lookyloo and trample their flower beds. So human rights activists can stand out front and call for justice – because until people do that, shades of Trayvon Martin and the struggle his family had towards getting GZ even arrested or charged.

OMG it is illegal to leak the name—Is it?? I don’t give a fuck. I believe it is also illegal to shoot a human being in the back of the head for no reason. So yeah. Contact me.

Or just go on ahead and get it done. You have the skills. You know what to do. I’m hoping to read about a name and the address in the next 24 hours. It will happen.

How’s this for a blog post title: Who Killed Renisha McBride?

And media, stop calling him “the gunman” or “the shooter”. He is The Murderer. The Killer. The Cowardly Killer of you want a nice catchy phrase for your news segments and articles.

You murder me, you don’t get to sit comfy in your home all anonymous and go on about your life. You. Do. NOT. Get. To. Do. That.


UPDATE: It is now being said that the murderer shot 19 year old Renisha McBride in the FACE instead of what was reported at first, him shooting the back of her head.

I love that this is being bandied about now. If only to bolster up his claim of self defense or stand your ground or whatever else he might wish to cloak himself with to get  away with cold blooded murder.

I don’t care if he did shoot that young woman in the face. I hear that he is also claiming the shotgun “went off accidentally”. I asked this question on twitter when I heard this latest line of bullshit update:

Doesn’t a weapon have to be aimed at the head in order for the bullet to enter the head/face region of the body?

So whether or not the gun “went off accidentally” this man had his weapon pointed at this young woman’s head, with his finger on the trigger AND well within what is considered point blank range.

Again, I talk about choices.

I have lived alone for most of my life. I prefer it that way. But I also know the realities of the world. I don’t open my door to just anyone, if I am able, I take a look at who is at the door, and try to see if they are armed or not.

Usually I have a conversation through the closed door, or from a side or above window or what have you. Especially when you are not expecting visitor and/or it’s after midnight etc.

I can usually verbally deter an unwanted visitor from continuing to hang by my front door, stay on my property etc. I’m not a gun owner, but if I was, I’d be trying the verbal thing first, (and a couple two three other choices) before putting my finger on the trigger and aiming my weapon at that person’s head.

He had a shotgun. She was unarmed and asking for help. He either shot her in the face, or in the back of the head. The autopsy and other forensics will be able to officially determine that. Even if his weapon was discharged “by accident”, he for sure had a bead on her, like she was an armed assassin coming for him.

So either way, this murderer was In The Wrong, and he needs to be charged with something. He needs to spend some time behind bars for taking the life of an innocent, unarmed, fellow civilian who was simply seeking his help.

Also. How are you being threatened when you not only are the only person armed in this situation AND you have your big sturdy house with all its locks and doors AND phones that work should you need to call for help from this deadly threat embodied by an injured woman asking for help?

Yeah, NO.

Also Of Note: The media went from referring to this murderer as “shooter” or “gunman” to “homeowner” and “householder” in a matter of hours. I watched it happen right before my eyes. Inferring that he was protecting his SACRED PROPERTY from a threat and was well withing his rights to gun down that young woman in cold blood.

And at the same time, there was speculation about some “missing hours” that Renisha had allegedly spent between when her accident occurred and when she knocked on that door for help.

Interesting, isn’t it?

I’m beginning to think that white people get this little pamphlet handout with each gun they purchase. In this pamphlet it clearly outlines what stand your ground, no duty to retreat and self defense laws are in extant in the area in which you live. At the end of the pamphlet it highlights that you can, by invoking these laws, kill a nigger and never get charged or spend a day in jail or prison, so happy shootin, hoss!


Bring it.


I won’t apologize for my tone and my language in this post. I am at my breaking point and I often vent on this blog to help me work things out.
Like I said at the beginning, feel free to ditch the fuck on out, but I hope you stick around with me and let’s fight this True American Horror Story with all our might, our hearts and our souls.
This cannot keep happening. I won’t stand for it. I won’t.
Out him. Dox him. I want that murdering coward known to EVERYONE.

About Awake BW

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13 Responses to White Man Shoots Black Woman In The Back Of The Head Because She Asked For Help

  1. I completely agree with you! We need a name and justice! I want to leave the country too! Racism is apparently here to stay and will forever be looked upon as normal behavior. Outraged!

    • Awake BW says:

      Mind you, I know racism is found everywhere. I’m bailing because I know down to the marrow of my bones I won’t survive America’s Special Brand of Racism.

      That, coupled with our nation’s obsession with firearms and prisons that is unique in the world: I’m outtie.

      I also ascribe to the Reach Back philosophy that was recently touched upon several times during the Black Girls Rock celebration.

      When I make it out, I’ll do whatever I can to help anyone else who wants/needs to ditch the heck outta Dodge too. Maybe this is the glimmering of my oft fantasized about GTFO Foundation…

      Just checking in on my blog, after being woken by a nightmare and having trouble getting back to sleep. Saw your comment. I want to see this murderer outed and pay for what he’s done.

      Then for the sake of my sanity, I’m going to start stepping back on reacting to these sorts of incidents, and focus my energies on my expatriation.

      Stay Strong, I got your back. Also stay tuned, because I will be documenting my progress and writing tips, tricks and advice on how to relocate.

  2. this whole thing is disgusting and sickening, I see people are trying to see why she was there and oh my favorite why did she walk 4 blocks to that house. They just gotta question everything about the victim instead of asking why did he come to the door with a gun and why did the police lie. I know ppl say he should’ve called the police if he was so worried but sadly I think death could’ve been the same outcome. People can’t rationalize this or excuse but I know they will try, its sad this young woman was my age.
    As for ppl b1chin about black girls rock and naacp it just shows are dumb and insecure they really are. if they knew anything they’d know that the naacp was made by whites. black girls do rock and its not like the show says black girls are better than these other women it is to empower black women and young girls to counter all the bs we see. so its ok for them to make studies about black women being ugly but the moment we say we rock its a dam problem, the moment we say we love ourselves its a problem. those ppl are racist, they are ok with studies saying black women are ugly but are *gasp* outraged about a show about black girls saying we rock not even putting other women down or saying we are better than them but just that we rock in our own way is an issue. Hypocrites all of them, black history month isn’t racist either, its one dam month out of the year, and even then its not enough to cover all of our history just the basics. meawhile we learn all about the great white ppl of the country and the world but god forbid we have one month out of 12 months learning about ourselves a little bit.

    • Awake BW says:

      And that is the one essential thing racists and racism apologists just don’t get.
      Celebrations and uplifting of Black people are done with just that. Show of support, encouragement, sharing of knowledge etc.

      Not at the expense of anyone else.

      It says a lot about the person who sees those things through the lens that says you can’t uplift, celebrate and support without standing on someone else’s neck, or putting down someone else, or denigrating another person or people.

      Actually you CAN. And we DO.
      I have yet to see the concept of the KKK’s “white power” be coupled with anything else but hate and denigration of non-whites. It never just stands alone despite all efforts in rebranding.

      Which is why it is so hard for some people to understand that our Black History Month, our Black Girls Rock, our Black organizations are yes, in response to the climate in which we live, but are not there to put down white people while we do it.

      When we say: “I love myself” so many hear “you hate me”.
      That is on them, not us. If they have not learned the simple skill of being able to love something without hating the opposite thing, then sucks to be them.

  3. Wellwisher says:

    I am glad I came across your thoughts on this horrible crime. If I may offer one comment as a white man, I think racial hatred is by definition IMpersonal. The racist doesn’t know or want to know you, as a feeling, thinking person. Sometimes the racist is capable of making individual exceptions for people he comes to know by chance, which only proves the rule. I don’t pretend to know the solution, which is why I think it will be a great loss for the rest of us if people like you do leave the US. If we need one thing, it is more honest dialogue. But I can’t say I blame you. Good luck.

    • Awake BW says:

      The nice thing about our digitalized world, is that I can still have my voice heard no matter where I am on this planet. Or at least from the places I’m planning to live, visit and blog about and take pictures of. So there’s that ;)

      The dialog will continue, and I do appreciate your thoughts and words on this. It is that refusal to be seen, acknowledged and treated as a human being that kills. I didn’t realize how much, and in such specific ways until I did live in, travel to and visit other countries, and I was so shocked and surprised to be treated like any other human being by the people there.

      James Baldwin said of that same feeling about his experience in France: ““Every Negro in America carries through his life the burden of race consciousness like a corpse on his back. I shed that corpse when I stepped off the train in Paris.”

      I can’t be certain of my complete well-being if I stay in the confines of America. It isn’t just the physical danger but the emotional & spiritual as well. Geographical Therapy is what it’s called. I may heal up enough to consider returning, but I really don’t think so for anything longer than a visits now and then to reconnect with family.

      And speaking of, I come from a globe-trotting family. I flew around the world three times before I was seven years old. I grew up in other countries. My siblings and I even had cute lil Afro-British accents when we were kids. My parents travel and have spent blocks of years living overseas. My siblings travel. Significant portions of my life were spent living in other countries.

      In Europe and France, I wasn’t African-American or a Black American, I was an American. In the African countries I lived in, I was just another Black face in the crowd. I was only different the moment I opened my mouth to speak, and then, I was again, just an American.

      Here in America, I am never “American” or “just an American”.

      I now have the chance to be able to come full circle and get back out there and live Somewhere Else. I won’t let it pass me by.

  4. rahima456 says:

    Reblogged this on Blogging in Indy and commented:
    This self-explanatory!!!!

  5. Paige says:

    Dear Awake BW, Thank you for being so honest. The only word I can come up with is “disgusting.” How can anyone do this to another person because they have a different amount of melanin in their skin? If this person IS actually mentally insane: I hope they are put in a padded room, in a straight jacket, alone until they die. Otherwise, I think they should be subject to electroshock therapy, with the electrodes on their twig and berries! …….. until they die. Maybe this murderer needs to go “missing” and never found.

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